Thus far this year.
My grandpa died.
My grandmothers are going senile.
My aunt is depressed.
My uncle got knocked off his motorbike.
My cousins labour needs to be induced.
I lost two kilos.
I wish I were dead. Not to be over dramatic. I was thinking about it the other day, and I want a perfect day, and then I want to die.
Sometimes I live in this place where I can only be happy. It seems silly to think I could be anything but.
But sometimes, it's like everything is so close, so .. dark. I just don't know what to do. I think myself a fool for tricking myself into being so happy. How dare I?
I'm not a strong enough person to deal with the things my mind makes me think of.
Two kilos. Only eight to go.
At least one thing is going the right way.
Love and lite,
T.
