Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Day Four - Monday

So I went to school after not wanting to leave my bed at all. I almost fell asleep a few times taking notes for three hours straight. Halfway through the morning, my left leg went numb. Not in the tingly, dead-feeling kind of way, I just couldn't feel the skin or anything I did to it. I left as soon as we finished and went home to have a nap. My brother dropped me at the BFs after dinner and we hung out, which was nice... Except I think I let it go too far. He apologised and we kissed and it was nice but then we had sex and even though it still felt good it just left me feeling confused. I took my little pill before I went to see him and after the sex I was absolutley exhausted. It's like deflating a balloon. I didn't know what was going on, I couldn't stop shaking I was just a mess. We cuddled XD which was nice and I left pretty soon after. My friend S told me she wasn't going to be able to give me a ride Tuesday morning which meant I could've stayed at the BFs rather than going home, which would have been nice. Ah well. I went straight home to bed and sleep.

Day Five - Tuesday

I stayed away from school and worked from home, which is code for watched re-runs of the Kardashians. I'm a reality tv whore, I'm sorry. I blame my generation. I felt awful all day, just slow and tired and I didn't get hardly anything done, with two deadlines in two days, I'm screwed. I got a ride over to the BFs after taking another pill and we hung out with a few of his friends until close to midnight. I fell asleep and got woken up to someone telling me to get out of their car. Nice, eh? I fell asleep with y boyfriend, which was nice. That hasn't happened in a while.

Day Six - Wednesday (Today)

I woke up and woke up my BF with a nice alarm :) It was good to wake up with someone there next to you that you trust and thats happy to see you. But, after a make-up session in the shower, or the start of one, I almost blacked out and he just got weird. I think maybe he thinks I'm just doing this for attention, but I'm not, I just have no idea what is happening with my head and I haven't been eating (yay) and I just get really dizzy all the time. After he left to go to work, which was just awkward, he looked so ... lost. I went to the see the Doc again, this time he had my blood results and gave me some iron tablets and a letter for time off from school and work until Monday, which helps with work but not so much school because we finish for the first term in two days and I have two assignments I have to finish before then. I'm fucked. I'm going to bed and going to sleep and going to enjoy it. I hope. Unfortunately alone tonight, but hopefully not for long :)

Goodnight Angels,

T.

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