Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Day Five...

So, today, I think I've done pretty well for myself. I haven't eaten anything yet. I am on my second Diet Coke though, which doesn't make me happy. So, no more after this one. I find drinking through a straw make me drink slower, so, more time wasted not eating!
I have also given up chocolate, completely. It was disturbing, the amount I ate, I didn't like it at all. I hate having no control over myself. But What do I find when I get to my aunts house, after my declaration of non-chocolatedness? She's just been shopping. For candy. AAH!
I have control. I'm finding the one thing that's helping me right now, is, weirdly, a movie quote. "No sacrifice, no victory" has been doing the rounds in my head today, and it's true. i won't get anywhere if I don't give some things up.
I'm claiming tummy-upsetedness when my aunt comes in, and having a tomato soup (approx 60 Cal's) and some crackers after if I'm hungry. I find the earlier I eat, the more I eat. I'm still a fully functioning person if I don't have breakfast (shock, horror), so, I think if I take a leaf out of someone else's book here, I am now committed to drinking two litres of water per day before food consumption. I guess that it'll get things moving, if you know what I mean, and that way I won't be as hungry.
I'd rather starve than binge.
But. As I'm on my ABC's (which have been going okay, actually), I am sticking to the Plan. I'm going to eat later on. I'm actually looking forward to fasting. Planning makes me feel in control. Staying away from the kitchen does too.
More later, I'm sure.
Love and strength,
T.

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